So here we are, stuck in a hole. Let’s keep it tidy and say it has four 8ft tall walls with floral print paper. We can see people walking by, and every once in a while someone looks down then continues on their way. Shouting doesn’t seem to do any good; a smile and a wave is the only answer we receive. In this 6ft x 6ft hole we have no way to scale the walls. Nope, we are down here alone.

Welcome to our state of mind. Though we can clearly see people around us, we are isolated. Our options for movement are limited. People are telling us to stop wasting time and climb out. How do we climb out of this hole? As stated, we’ve cried for help, but smiles don’t lift us up and out. We need someone to physically lend a hand. This requires time and effort from others. No one wants to be a bother to others. Hope fades with each hour we are in the hole. Days turn into weeks. Weeks turn into a year. We are tired and defeated. We have accepted the reality no one wants to get involved. No one has the time to help. No one cares. If there is no way out, why go on?

In our time in this hole we have seen three types of hands. The first type pulls us down. These are the people that feed off of the misery of others. They are the reason people say “misery loves company”. The second type pushes us down. We are their stepping stone. They exalt themselves at our expense. Look how better they are compared to us. This type of hand will also ask “what’s in it for me” when we ask for help. Lastly, we have the helping hand. The one that takes the time to help pull us out. Sometimes, it’s done by them just setting quietly beside us. These hands are rare. In a world where hands are quick to grab a phone and post videos online, genuine helping hands are rarely seen. “Look at how I helped” is not genuine. No, this hand seeks recognition. Don’t be that hand.

So, how do we get out of this hole? First we need to change. Our way of thinking is holding us down. People around us are holding us down. Negativity is winning. We need to stop blaming ourselves. The time for that has past. Now is the time for reconciliation. Face the fact. We do not deserve to stay in this hole. It’s not fair to our friends and family, and most importantly it is not fair to us to stay in this hole. If the hands around us will not help, or are not able to help, then we must call on other hands. This may require a helpline. Helplines not only provide a ladder for us to climb out with, but they also may provide guidance to prevent future falls.

The last thing we want to do is find ourselves in a hold with no way out.

Listen.

There is always a way out.

We are worth the time and effort to help. Never for a second believe otherwise. Being in a hole can have us feeling isolated, exhausted, a lack of appetite or an over abundance of appetite, worthless, or obsolete. Most of us have felt these feelings. No one is immune to falling in a hole. And when it happens we must do whatever is possible to climb out of the hole in order regain our life. You are so worth it.

Until next blog, stop staring at the floral paper 🙂 and take care.

at1_retired@yahoo.com

Steve Curtis