Last week we covered the competitive relationship. We often see this type of unity in new relationships. And rightfully so. We all have a need for self preservation. But in order for a relationship to mature, someone has to give. That brings us to today’s blog.
There are three types of “give-take” relationships (+/-) or if one prefers (-/+). They are predation, parasitism, and herbivory relationship. Who knew “give-take” could be so complicated?
First up is the predation relationship. This destructive bond leaves one side depleted while the other reaps full benefits. Like a wolf to a deer, one is consumed while the other gains nourishment. Just so we’re clear, I’m not talking about actual cannibalism. Rather, a relationship where a person stalks then latches on and depletes a victim. Ever heard of a person marrying for money. Then they divorce when the bank dries up only to move on to their next victims.
Second is the parasitism relationship. Like the predation relationship this one has a member that latches on. However, it doesn’t devour then move on. No, this parasite is in for the long haul. The negative aspect comes from the verbal and physical abuse. In biology parasites don’t just feed from their host. They spread diseases. The disease keeps the host in a weaken state and the parasite has the upper hand without killing the host. This is prevalent when mental and/or physical attacks exist until the victim submit. Surprisingly, in this relationship the victim feels weak and dependent on the aggressor. Truth is, the host is stronger and has more ability to become independent. However, words and actions can be the worse blinders.
And last we have the herbivory relationship. As in the previous two relationship, one person is dependant and the other is 100% supportive. Think of it as grazers. In keeping this analogy simple, we have an animal eating grass. That’s it. Please don’t nuke this and bring up that manure from the animal nourishes the plants. Instead, stay focused on the plant and the animal eating; that’s the complete picture. (can you tell I’ve had this discussion before. 🙂 )The herbivor doesn’t kill the grass. They only take what they need. The grass gets its nutrients from the ground. We see this alot when a person is unable to care for themselves and someone else needs to assist. Some may think of raising children as a herbivory relationship. But I believe what comes from raising children far outweighs what goes into children. (Note: I do not have children nor plan to raise children. This is an observational statement.)
As one can see, a “give-take” relationship can be detrimental or it can be beneficial. The difference is whether either side suffers. Negativity will not breed positivity. Often this is the second stage of a marriage. As a couple begins to settle in both parties may not be eager to give. Or as we have seen earlier, they may not be able to give. Such is our journey in life. Important thing to remember is to abstain from negativity. Identify if anyone is being a parasite or predator to us. If someone brings negativity into a relationship, they are not promoting growth. It’s just that simple.
Until the next blog, live life, be happy, and find life’s happiness.