I Want You To Hurt As I Do

Have you ever faced an overly happy person just minutes after waking up? We may even growl a little to warn sunshine pants that they are on dangerous grounds. Notice the mismatched attitudes versus the reactions of both parties. One is a bundle of joy while the other is a bowl of good-gravy; I’m not there yet.

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

This is important to note. How often do we encounter someone with a polar opposite attitude? Now imagine a person who just received news that they are getting laid off and they are in a roomful of people celebrating So-and-so’s birthday. Bad-news-bear may not want to stay for the party and may project their feelings and emotions onto others if forced to do so.  

There is a primal mindset that will question the situation. Why should we be the only ones hurting? We want others to know the pain we feel. This is why we often say or do things that we don’t mean. We don’t want to be alone, and we shouldn’t be alone. 

There are times that we have trouble expressing our feelings. How do we tell others that we hurt without sounding petty? We should ask a trusted friend to lend an ear, but make sure to let them know that we don’t know how to express how we feel. This affords them an upfront explanation of the jumbled words that will follow. As we speak, it is essential to breathe. Hey, emotions can leave us breathless. Keep calm and speak clear if you want the listener to understand what is said. I once had a junior sailor tell me his whole life story while sobbing through every word. To this day, I cannot tell you anything he said. However, I let him finish. When he appeared calmer, I informed him that I couldn’t comprehend any word formations. To my surprise at the time, he just smiled and said, “That’s all right.” 

Photo by Tan Danh from Pexels

Misery does love company, but a pained heart also loves a good ear. We often forget to check on each other. Our routine wraps us up, and our focus is on everything that is an arm’s length away. Perhaps if we took the time to look up and asked how everyone was doing, we could alleviate the isolated feeling others feel. This would also afford others a chance to unload their thoughts; just make sure we are ready in case they do choose to unload everything onto us.

Until the next blog, live life and be happy. 

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